Without going into the gory details, because honestly, they aren't relevant, and karma or the authorities have taken care of most of the situations, I am at a point in my life where I am no longer afraid to say these words out loud.
So why do I choose to? Because I continue to see the sexualization of our children daily under the guise of female empowerment, self-love, and body positivity. I can tell you from experience that I was too young to understand and process everything, so it warped my views, and not in a positive way.
By the time I was old enough to date, I didn't love or respect myself or my body, so I didn't demand that anyone else did either. I didn't learn self-love or body positivity from my early exposure to sex at all. Quite the opposite happened, as I was actually left feeling that my only power came from sex. I was embarrassed, ashamed, and confused sex with love more often than I care to admit.
In this current climate and culture, what I want my nieces, my friends' daughters, the girls my sons date to know is this. Body positivity comes from knowing that, though your body is gorgeous no matter what size, shape, or color it is, and you should be in awe of the amazing things it can do every single day, not everyone is worthy of seeing it.
Self-love can be found in knowing that, though the content of their character should never be judged by the clothing they choose, there is a time and place for everything, and they should respect themselves and the event enough to know the difference.
We should be teaching ALL of our children that even if they are buck naked with a partner, and things are getting steamy, the moment EITHER ONE of them says "stop," or anything similar, the other should, without hesitation or judgment.
We should want them to know that their power comes way more from what's between their ears and their lungs than their legs. Their power comes from knowing that the right and worthy partner will be equally interested in getting to know all three.
The things that happen to you don't define you, they simply become a part of your story. It's up to you to decide if they become the plot, a chapter, a paragraph, or a footnote. And REAL HUMAN empowerment comes from having the maturity to know with whom and when to share your freak flag, whether it be vanilla white, blackest black, or any of the fifty shades of grey in between.
Commentaires